You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
