But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
