We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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