Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Randomize
