The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
