I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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