What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
