im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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