your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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