She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
