The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
