You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Life is so much better after having sex.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
