everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
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