Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
