i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
