next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
it was like eating out sand paper
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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