what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Your penis caused this!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
