rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize