i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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