We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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