It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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