The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
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I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
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