Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
