Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
