took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
