doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
