And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
