I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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