Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
