discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I love having hate sex.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
