found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
