Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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