just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
