This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Randomize
