She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
You need a sexual gate keeper
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
