capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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