new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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