yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
