We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
