God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
