we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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