OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
