ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize