so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
I love you. Go after that dick
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
