You really coming over, don't trick.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize
