Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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