I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
