you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
