people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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