you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
i need some magic done to my vagina
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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